| rinse and repeat |

so in my attempts to procrastinate as much as possible in studying (what's new, right?), i spent some time perusing through some of my old blog entries. i've had some interesting things rolling around in my head in the past. case in point:

February 5, 2006

| life. it is what it is. |

When we collide we lose ourselves.
When we collide we break in two,
And as we push and we shove and we hurt the ones we love,
It's a hard mistake.
When we collide,
We break.
-dishwalla-

its amazing sometimes how we forget about the influence we have on other people and in turn, how much of an impact other's words and actions have on our own lives. life is like a huge tapestry with threads of people intricately intertwined so tightly you cant really tell where one ends and the other begins. i have always said that people amaze me. maybe more specifically, the power of people. they can be the reason for the highest of highs, but also inflict the lowest of lows. they share our experiences. they offer themselves as friends, lovers, a helping hand, a shoulder to lean on, an ear to vent to, a running buddy, a mind to pick and pry, or maybe just as the stranger that warms your heart with a smile just when you think you've lost faith in the goodness of people. their words and actions, whether we know it or not, make an imprint on our lives and i believe that they really never fade. its easy to take credit for being behind a happy life-lifting moment but to be the cause of pain and misery, whether intentionally or not, is a little harder to understand and to accept. i guess this is where the forgetfulness comes into play. underestimation of the weight that our words and actions have. the sad part is that half the time, we never truly see or fully feel or even acknowledge the consequences-- we dont know...we're not on the receiving end. assumptions, broken promises, empty words, the unsaid, mixed emotions, confusing thoughts, disappointment, harsh statements, a cold shoulder, indifference, misleading actions...add that with misinterpretations and you have a recipe for disaster. sometimes i forget how fragile a person can be, especially when you have their heart in your hands. sometimes i forget that what i say and do affect another person, maybe in more ways than i can understand. sometimes i forget that my life is intertwined with so many others. sometimes i forget that i do have this power to create happiness (the kind that makes your cheeks hurt from smiling too much) but also sadness (the kind that makes you feel as though life is falling apart). everyone has this power. less games, more truth. less words, more action. less head, more heart.