| everything happens for a reason |

if i had a penny for every time i've heard that statement, i think i would almost have a dollar (: but really, i think theres much truth to that saying. granted sometimes, it is seriously the last thing you want to hear and at other time it feels as though there is no way in hell that theres any truth to it. in my own experience of super shitty events, things always seem to work out in the end so yes, i firmly believe that things do happen for a reason. whether or not we see it is a question of time. whether or not we accept it is a matter of choice. of attitude. but sometimes i wonder if its just a way to make ourselves feel better. so things didn't work out the way you wanted them to? so what. it just wasn't meant to be. maybe thats just not how it was suppose to happen. maybe this isn't the person you're suppose to be with. maybe you weren't meant to win that game. maybe you weren't suppose to get into that program. maybe you got injured for a reason. life is hard sometimes (and by sometimes i mean a lot of the times). i always say that i have the worst luck in the world. whether its my romantic life, sports, money, injuries watever. do i ask for it? do i try too hard? am i just doing stupid things? i dunno anymore. but i do know that in my case...shit happens. a lot. and each time i get knocked down, i get back up, dust myself off and keep going. but maybe i should stay down. just for a lil bit. maybe i should concede. maybe i'm not meant to get up and swing back. am i admitting defeat or am i just being realistic? im not sure what im thinking anymore. things happen for a reason they say. i believe it, but in this moment... the world seems to be caving in. im being swallowed and spit out and im scrambling...trying to stay in, trying to stay up, but its hard. i can do this. i always have before...but the more it happens, the harder it gets to pull through. im gettin too old for this, haha. if youre confused as to what im even talking bout, you're not alone. i have no idea what im talking bout. just thoughts. random ramblings of a troubled linda... stuck in a pickle. life is hard. but somehow i still love every minute of it.